What is Trust Based Parenting?

A holistic approach to parenting is important with any child, but particularly important with children who have a hard time trusting adults.  Often adopted children have been let down by an adult in their past, and their brain is wired to protect themselves and their hearts from being hurt again.  These kids often are difficult to love.  Sometimes because they don't believe themselves to be worthy of love, and sometimes because they try so hard to test you to see if you will actually continue to love them when they misbehave.

Trust Based Parenting focuses on meeting a child's physical needs and their emotional needs by prioritizing attachment and connection before correction and discipline.  A child has a very hard time obeying an adult that they do not yet trust, and when we constantly correct them they often feel more unlovable.  This is not to say that we do not discipline, but we do so with lots of grace and patience and AFTER we have shown them that we love and care for them, even when they misbehave.

It is a process, but raising children who know their worth and learn to securely attach to an adult, will be worth it in the end.  

Too often we forget that discipline really means to teach, not to punish. A disciple is a student, not a recipient of behavioral consequences.
— Dr. Daniel Siegel